Wednesday, September 23, 2009

How well do you know yourself/your spouse

Ya know after my post on Monday about marriages and issues that we face, I have been asking the LORD which direction should I take this? Every comment was positive and agreed that this needs to be discussed and addressed.....

Marriage takes work...ALOT OF HARD WORK. COMMITMENT. DEDICATION. DYING TO YOURSELF. INTIMACY. SPONTANEITY. and it takes knowing yourself and your spouse. One of the first things that we did with our Lifecoach was this. We took a test on ourselves ~ our personalities if you will. At the end of the test we found out what our personalities were. BUT here is the thing. We found out how those things about your spouse that drive you crazy....or just plain make you mad ~ GUESS WHAT?!?!?! They are your gift!
Here is my example.....One thing about me is I am the loud, outgoing, see something and I go for it, where my DH is EEYORE. He is quiet, thoughtful, and doesn't really get excited much and if I say "let's do it" he says" woah wait a minute here let me think about this".....screech.....WHAT DO YOU MEAN "wait a minute"??? Or there was also the fact that I was a stay at a home mom and didn't let's just say use all of my words.....A woman/sanguine woman at that needs to use all of her words or she will DIE :) LOL but my DH who is a off the charts melancholy needs quiet to be recharged because people drain him. WHo knew this stuff?? Him going to work and being drained all day by people and then coming home to a wife who needed to talk and go and do was killing us! You would think these are easy things to know but if you don't know them about yourselves or your spouse and you are drainging each other of course your marriages will suffer! (without even trying to) This is just simple everyday knowledge that helped so much in our relationship and continues to do so today. After taking these tests we were told to study our spouse....A school of them if you will. Know what makes them tick, what words to use (this is a big one!) I still have to dig deep on this one. What their strengths/weaknesses are.
Here is the wonderful thing about this: You can go to this website here and download the test for free. I recommend doing it for everyone in your family and your will see how amazing God is by putting the perfect combination together! If you want to you can purchase the book Personalty Plus by Florence Littauer to further learn more about your personalities. I did this but like I said this is something that I love to understand about people!

Of course, there are alot of things that we learned about our dependency on each other vs. our dependency on God. But this test is something I believed God used as a tool to help us and it can/will help you if you truly study and learn yourself and your spouse. It helps in raising kids as well What works for one doesn't work for the other, bc why? they are NOT the same personality! I have two opposite and trust me I cannot do the same thing with each child!

If you have any questions please ask but enjoy the test, and learning more about your families that God made you as a team! Together you will all work and learn to love each other in a whole new way!